Chapter 14: If It Sounds Like a Bad Idea, It Probably Is

*KELSEY'S POV*

Ugh...now that Rebecca has drug celebrity points in on us...much like crabs at a whore house (I recognize the irony of that statement...no wait, not irony...general fucked upness...that's it...it's a word, look it up).

So anyway, now the mailman is freaking out every time he gets a glimpse of any of us.  I'm starting to rethink the windows.

As for the kittens...

French Fry is really destructive...there isn't a single piece of furniture we have in the house.

Unfortunately, French Fry is the better one...he might scratch furniture, but Tugger scratches us.

Amy: Ouch!  You little mother fucker!

Kelsey: Are you okay?

Amy: Yeah, but this cat is gonna get it...

She catches him and I really think she's going to hurt him, but she doesn't.

Amy: Okay, family meeting.  These kittens have to go.

Kelsey: But why?

Amy: Well, let's see...one of them just tried to make shredded cheese out of my legs.

Rebecca: Yeah, the other one shredded my bed posts.

Zoey: Yeah, my arm looks like swiss cheese.

Kelsey: Can't we just give them a second chance?

Amy, Rebecca, & Zoey: NO!

Okay, fine.  Amy calls the social worker and she comes by as soon as possible.

She shows up and I want to cut the bitch...but...I know if I do, I'll be in more trouble than I want to deal with...so...I just let her take the kittens.  :(

*REBECCA'S POV*

After we get rid of the psycho kitties I head to the gym...and run into Bill's roommate Hugh.  He tries his Casanova crap on me, but he's already boned Amy and Kelsey...and I'm down with sharing socks, clothes, or even underwear, but boys?  Uh, no.

*AMY'S POV*

After getting rid of the demonic kitties, I get a mysterious phone call.

Male Voice: Is this Amy Keagan?

Amy: Yes.

Male Voice: I can help you.

Amy: Excuse me?

Male Voice: With your sister.

Amy: How did you...?

Male Voice: Meet me, I'll explain everything.

Amy: What?  When?

Male Voice: I'll call you back with instructions.

Amy: Wait...

Male Voice: Til' then...Good day.

That was freakin' weird...but thankfully I didn't have to wait for long until I got another call.

Male Voice: Listen carefully, I'm going to tell you exactly where to meet me.

I follow his directions to the letter and I end up in a part of town I have never seen before.

All I see is an abandoned building...what the hell am I doing?

But then I hear someone come up behind me.

Strange Man: Hello.

Amy: Um...hi?  

Man: Hello, my apologies for being so cryptic with you.  My name is Damian Dominic.

Amy: Um...okay, nice to meet you Mr. Dominic...I'm not really one for small talk, and you told me over the phone that you could help me with my sister.

Damian: *laughs* You really aren't one for small talk, are you?

Amy: No, and  I don't appreciate being played, so if you would just tell me how you can help...

Damian: *laughs* My, you do amaze me.  Fair enough.  I understand you are trying to prepare ambrosia, and you are very close to perfecting your cooking skill, is that correct?

Amy: Yeah, but I still have to get the gardening and fishing skills required to find the stuff..not to mention the make enough money to buy the cookbook...

Damian: What if I told you that I have access to the ingredients?

Amy: How?

Damian: I'm a collector of sorts...and I do have the required ingredients for that recipe...along with the cookbook.

Amy: Okay...

Damian: I would be willing to sell them to you...

What Nakia told me goes through my mind.  I'm sure these items are very expensive.  How am I going to come up with the money quickly?
Amy: That's very nice of you and everything...but I most likely won't be able to afford it...
Damian: True...these items are very rare.  I wouldn't consider giving them away for less than around $15,000.00.
Amy: 15...thousand...there's no way...

Damian: Well...perhaps we could work something else out?
Amy: Like what?
I start to shudder at what he could possibly want.  I've been on my back getting $200 a pop, I can't imagine what he would want for 15 g's...
Damian: Don't be wary...it's not one of those kinds of trades.  I have no interest in bedding you.

Amy: Um...thanks?  I...guess...
Damian: *laughs* Please don't be offended, I was just saying that we could look at our options...and come to a mutually beneficial agreement.

Damian: Okay, how about this...?

*ZOEY'S POV*

So Amy's telling me all about this Damian guy...and how Rebecca could become human again very soon.  I'm not so sure about all this...

Amy: So basically he offered to either loan me the money and I pay him back or he give me the money in return for a favor.
Zoey: What kind of favor?
Amy: I don't know...but whatever it is, I'm sure I can deal.
Zoey: How can you be so sure?  Maybe he wants a toe...or a finger...or Kelsey?
Amy: I can't imagine he would want any of that...he didn't want to screw me...maybe he's an okay guy.
Zoey: Uh-huh, or maybe torture and murder is what gets him going.
Amy: Well, I could just pay it off before he can ask me the favor.

Zoey: And can you guarantee that he isn't going to want something else later?  You might always be indebted to him.
Amy: Yeah...but this is for Rebecca, Z.  I have to...
Zoey: No, you have to learn to cook the spell, get the items, and do it yourself.  You know taking shortcuts never gets anyone anywhere but lost.

We continue discussing it over dinner and still don't have a meeting of the minds.
Amy: Look, I'll think about it...but I really want to do this.

Crap...her mind sounds set...and when it's set...let's just say there's no changing it...if she's going to change her mind, she's gonna do it herself.

All I can do is sit back and hope she doesn't get maimed and murdered.